Why I Stopped Trying to Fix Myself

Somewhere along the way, I stopped chasing versions of myself and started coming home instead.

For years, I felt like a never-ending project.

Always a little behind. Always a little broken.

Always searching for the next ritual, the next remedy, the next reset.

It was quiet at first, that belief that if I could just get more organized, more grounded, more well, I’d finally feel whole.

But eventually, the quiet turned into pressure.

Subtle, but heavy.

And here’s the truth I never expected to find:

I wasn’t broken. I was tired.

Tired of trying to turn myself into a version I thought would finally be “enough.”

Tired of believing healing had to be a hustle.

What I really needed wasn’t more self-work.

It was more self-kindness.

I needed to rest, not rewire.

To soften, not optimize.

To listen, not fix.

So, I started doing things differently.

I let go of the idea that peace had to look perfect.

I made room for messiness, for pauses, for rituals that didn’t have to be performed - I just felt.

And I stopped asking myself, “What’s wrong with me today?”

I started asking, “What would feel gentle right now?”

Some days, that answer is stillness.

Other days, it’s movement.

But the shift isn’t in what I do.

It’s in how I meet myself.

Without judgment. Without urgency.

Without the pressure to be someone else.

I stopped trying to fix myself.

And slowly, I started to feel free.

Would you like to take a breath with me?

If this resonates, you might like the free lockscreen wallpapers I made, soft colours, quiet quotes, no sign-up. Just something to keep your phone gentle, even when the day isn’t.

Or, read more in my Wellness With Ning blog; I’m slowly building a space for women who are tired of being told to push harder, be better, do more.

We’re not projects to fix.

We’re people.

And you’re allowed to just be, exactly where you are.

— Ning